Vol. 5, No. 10
U.S. Environmental Protection Agency
                                                                                                   October 1976
  STEIGERWALO
  HONORED
         Bern J.  Steigerwald
    Bern J.  Steigerwald, Deputy Assis-
  tant Administrator for OAQPS has  been
  selected as the  Federal Environment-
  al Engineer of the Year.  The award
  recognizes exemplary work and accom-
  plishments of environmental engineers
  in the Federal service and is spon-
  sored by the Conference of Federal
  Environmental Engineers in coopera-
  tion with the U.S. Civil Service
  Commission.
    EPA Administrator Russell E. Train
  nominated Dr. Steigerwald for the
  award citing his outstanding leader-
  ship and achievement in initiating
  and directing the EPA air programs.
  Train said, "Dr. Steigerwald has
  set an outstanding example in Feder-
  al-State cooperation.  His work has
  been instrumental in our progress
  toward achieving our National Ambient
  Air Quality Standards."
    The award was presented at a meet-
  ing of the Conference of Federal  En-
  vironmental Engineers on October  28
  at Boiling Air Force Base, Washing-
  ton, D.C.
     MIREX  UNDER

    INVESTIGATION

         by Elaine Hyman

   Mirex, a controversial ant poison
and possible cancer-causing sub-
stance,  has been under investigation
by Dr. Neil Chernoff,  Research Tera-
tologist, Dr. Thomas  Scottie, Re-
search Pathologist,  and Ralph E.
Linder,  Research Biologist, HERL.
   According to Dr.  August Curley,
Chief of the Toxicology Branch,
"These studies are a  follow-up and
refinement  of work previously done
by Dr. Renate D. Kimbrough and Thomas
B. Gaines,  former employees with EPA,
Atlanta."
   Speaking for the group, Dr. Cher-
noff revealed that Mirex produces
cataracts in newborn rats and mice
when exposed to the pesticide shortly
after birth.
   As a  research teratologist, Dr.
Chernoff investigates the effect of
pesticides  in fetal  and newborn ani-
mals.
   During the course of the study,
over 400 to 500 litters of rats were
tested.   Mirex was administered by
gastric  intubation directly to the
mother.   The offspring were then ex-
posed to the pesticide through the
mother's milk.  After exposure, cata-
racts appeared in the offspring as a
white area  in the lens sufficiently
large enough to be visible without
the aid  of  instrumentation.
   While Mirex was found not  to  pro-
duce defects when administered  to
pregnant animals, the study does
raise the question of whether early
exposure to a chemical which  produces
(Continued  on page 2)
                  1
                                  RECIPIENT
                                  OF  AWARD
                                          Dr.  John B. Clements
                                     Dr.  John  B. Clements, Chief, QAB/
                                  EMSL,  received the first Moyer D.
                                  Thomas  award given by  the American
                                  Society for  Testing and Materials.
                                     The  presentation was made by ASTM
                                  president, John S.  Wheeler,
                                  on October 19, at the  Shamrock Hilton
                                  in Houston,  Texas.
                                     The  Thomas Award consists of a
                                  gold medal and is given in recogni-
                                  tion of outstanding achievement in
                                  the field of the sampling and analy-
                                  sis of  atmosphere with emphasis on
                                  contributions leading  to the develop-
                                  ment and use of consensus standards.
                                     Dr.  Clements received the award
                                  for "outstanding contributions to
                                  the art and  science of air quality
                                  measurement, providing leadership in
                                  the spirit of cooperation extant be-
                                  tween EPA and the consensus standards
                                  system  of ASTM, and meritorious ser-
                                  vice to Committee D-22."
                                     A native  of Dillwyn, Va., Dr.
                                  Clements received his  Bachelor's
                                  degree  from  Hampden Sydney College
                                  (Continued on page  8)

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MIREX....(Continued from page 1)
cataracts may lead to greater sus-
ceptibility for cataracts later in
life.
   According to Dr. Chernoff, "A  cata-
ract is a rare phenomenon in children
but is a common occurrence in older
people."
   In another study recently released
by Edwin L. Johnson, Deputy Assistant
Administrator for Pesticide Programs,
EPA, Washington, Mi rex was found  in
37 samples of human fatty tissue  out
of 120 samples analyzed, which brings
the problem even closer to human
health.
   Johnson also confirmed that EPA
has analyzed tests performed over
the past 18 months on rats at the
National Cancer Institute, and drew
the tentative conclusion that Mirex
was causing cancer in test animals.
EPA is currently awaiting the con-
clusions from the Institute's own
cancer experts.
   For the past five years,  EPA has
considered banning Mirex, but its
concern  has been over possible ad-
verse effects on marine life.   Mirex,
a very persistent chemical with an
extraordinary life in the environment,
kills shrimp in extremely low concen-
trations.
   Mirex is currently being used  to
control  the fire ant, a pest, which
now infests 133 million acres in
nine southern states, reaching from
Florida  to Texas.  The fire ant,
which resembles ordinary house and
garden ants, poses a threat to the
farmers  in these areas.
   Dr. Chernoff and other EPA re-
searchers are currently gathering
information and data on all  facets
of Mirex.  This information will  be
used to support a final decision  on
the use of this pesticide.
                   EPA'ERS  IN THE NEWS
    EPA'ers were back to back at a
 recent meeting of the U.S. Commis-
 sioned Officers Association held at
 the Faculty Club of North Carolina
 State University.
    Retiring president, Bill Vatavuk,
 SASD, turned the gavel over to the
 incoming president, Dr. Bill Kirk,
 HERL.  Other new officers installed
 were Gregory Bujewski, Vice-presi-
 dent and Amos Slaymaker, Secretary-
 treasurer.
    Engraved plaques were awarded to
 past presidents of the North Carolina
 Branch.  Receiving awards were:
 Ronnie Townsend, Gerald Akland,  Amos
 Slaymaker, and Bill Vatavuk.  All  in
 all  it was a big night for our CO's
 from EPA.
    In an informal ceremony held  at
 RTP on October 5, a mobile van hous-
 ing an electrostatic precipitator
 was turned over to Dr. John Burchard,
 Director, IERL, by Joe Brumfield of
 the Naval Surface Weapons Center,  the
 Contractor for the van.
    The Naval Surface Weapons Center
 and EPA began its mutual association
 three years ago under the auspices
 of  the Technology Transfer Program.
 This program seeks to join Defense
 Department expertise and civilian
  agencies' requirements in a joint
  effort toward problem solution.
     In presenting the keys, Brumfield
  said, "The objective of this present
  effort was to provide the Agency with
  two mobile processes, a wet scrubber
  and an-electrostatic precipitator.
  The wet  scrubber was delivered in
  December 1974.  We are here today  to
  announce the completion of this
  effort and to formally release the
  units to EPA.  But more than that,
  we  are here to acknowledge our enjoy-
  ment in  an effort that has provided
  professional stimulation, new know-
  ledge, and equally important, new
  friends.  We believe that while  EPA
  has gained new research and evalua-
  tion hardware, the Navy has gained
  a greater understanding of approaches
  that can be used to solve Navy pro-
  blems.   It has been a venture in
  which both activities have profited."

     Burchard noted that "The larger
  dust particles emitted by industrial
  smoke can generally be controlled.
  The EPA  units now in operation will
  aid in the control of finer particles,
  which can sometimes lodge themselves
  deeper in the lungs and do more  dam-
  age."
    BOTTLED  KILLER  BLOODIES
   With a blood  alcohol concentration
of one-tenth of  a  percent (0.10) a
driver is seven  times more likely to
be responsible for having a  fatal
crash, than he would be with no
alcohol, says the  "Second Annual
Report to the U.S.  Congress  on
Alcohol and Health."
   But the probability of being  re-
sponsible for a  fatal crash  is
essentially the  same among drivers
with low blood alcohol concentration
(BAC) or less than one-twentieth of
a percent (0.05),  as  it  is among
drivers with no  alcohol.
   The relative  hazard curve rises
STREETS  AND  HIGHWAYS
 very sharply above this lower  limit
 for a driver while intoxicated  (DWI).
 Violation in most states is  0.15 per-
 cent.  At a BAC of 0.15 percent, a
 driver would be 25 times more  likely
 to be responsible for a fatal  crash;
 at 0.18 percent he or she would be
 60 times more likely; and at 0.20
 percent (namely,  at the average BAC
 found among convicted DWI's, and
 among fatally injured drivers  who
 would have been eligible for a  DWI
 conviction) he or she would  be  at
 least 100 times more likely  to  be
 responsible for a fatal crash  than
 if they had not been drinking  at all.

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TRAINING
(Left to right) James M.  McDuffie,  Training  Officer,  EPA;  John  H.  DeFord,
Director of Administration, EPA;  Albert N. Whiting, NCCU Chancellor; and
Dr. Waltz Maynor, Director of Continuing Education and  Summer Sessions, NCCU.
   "SCHOOL DAYS, SCHOOL DAYS,  GOOD
OLD GOLDEN RULE DAYS," was the order

of the day for some EPA employees as
they wended their way to the audito-
rium in the EPA Administration Build-
ing, at 4:00 p.m., September 13.

   The adage, "You can't teach an old

dog new tricks," is obsolete,  as  this
reporter can attest.
   Through an agreement between North

Carolina Central University and EPA,
the University is offering three

courses this semester through the

Learning Center at EPA's Research
Triangle facility.
   The courses being offered are
English Composition, Introduction to

Quantitative Methods, and a seminar
in Public Administration.
   EPA employees are taking  the

courses at no cost to themselves  and
NCCU is providing teachers,  materials,
and administrative costs,  as well  as

textbooks.  Each course is limited to
twenty students.

   Jim McDuffie,  EPA's Training
Officer, is directing the  program.

The college level courses  are part of
an extensive training program con-

ducted by the Federal  agency for  its

employees.  Other activities of the
Learning Center include career devel-

opment programs,  independent study
programs, brief review courses under

an individual learning program, and

special interest programs.
 The CLEANER TIMES  is  published monthly  by Public
 Affairs. Office of Administration. U.S. Environmental
 Protection Agency. Research Triangle Park. N.C. 27711.

 Liz Martin 	Editor
 Dorothy Rose 	Assistant Editor
 Elaine Hyman 	Reporter

 Produced with the assistance of the Word Processing Center:
 Graphics, Composition, and Printing Sections. GSD: Forms
 and Publications Center. GSD.
        Ouchless.
      Join the Payroll Savings Plan.
           lake stock in America.
SOLUTION:
     The autopsy revealed that a Webly-Vickers  50.80 was  the  murder
weapon and that Fecheimer was shot just after being run over  by  the
tractor, thus the killer had to be on the scene at 4:11 A.M.   Anyone  who
claimed to be somewhere else the night of July  4-5 could  not  have  com-
mitted the crime since no one can be in two places at  the same time.   (If
the denial of the crime is false, then each statement  about being  in
another place is true.)  The Mechanic, The Topper, Grimey and Mean Mary
are thus eliminated.  The culprit, therefore, is Rotten Rocky.
REGISTRATION  FOR EPA

LEARNING  CENTER

EVENING  COURSES

January to June 1977
When: Oct. 4, 76 - Nov. 4, 76
Where:  Personnel Management Div.
        Administrative Bldg.
        RTP, N.C.
Who:    Federal and non-Federal
        Employees
How:    a. Federally Sponsored
        b. Self Sponsored
        c. Non-Federally Sponsored

           Procedure
Agency Sponsored - Submit Optional
Form  170 through appropriate manage-
ment  channels.
Self  Sponsored - Submit Optional
Form  170 directly to Leona Col gla-
zier, Registrar (MD-29) EPA, RTP,
NC 27711
Non-Federal Organization Sponsored -
Submit a letter from appropriate
organization authorized official
including the following information:
1. Title and date of course
2. Name, address, position title of
   nominee
3. Office to which bill should be
   forwarded

ACCOUNTING I
Cost:     $100
Time:     5:00-6:30 Mon and Wed
Place:    Auditorium
Location: Administrative Building

ANATOMY AND PHYSIOLOGY
Cost:     $100
Time:     6:30-8:00 Mon and Wed
Place:    Auditorium
Location: Administration Building

ART OF MOTIVATING PEOPLE
Cost:     $100
Time:     5:00-6:30 Tues and Thurs
Place:    Auditorium
Location: Administration Building

BOOKKEEPING
Cost:     $100
Time:     6:30-8:00 Tues and Thurs
Place:    Auditorium
Location: Administration Building

BUSINESS LAW
Cost:     $100
Time:     5:00-6:30 Mon and Wed
Place:    Conference Room, Beaunit
          Annex, 128
Location: Administration Building

BUSINESS MANAGEMENT
Cost:     $100
Time:     6:30-8:00 Mon and Wed
Place:    Conference Room, Beaunit
          Annex, 128
Location: Administration Building

(Continued on  page 8)

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 WHO'S  UP  FRONT
    Our "Up Front"  secretaries  this
 month are Sue  Miller,  CMD/OA, Karen
 Burnett Curtis,  ESRL/ERC,  and  Fran
 Whitlow,  P&M Staff/OAQPS.
 and well  liked by all in the divi-
 sion."
know it the crisis is over.   I  am
pleased to have this opportunity to
make a few comments about Karen and
to tell her and the other readers of
The Cleaner Times that she is sin-
             Sue Miller

   Sue Miller is secretary to D.  K.
Richmond, Director, Contracts Manage-
ment Division,  Office of Administra-
tion.  She is a graduate of Hard-
barger's Business College, Raleigh.
She came to EPA in 1971 right after
graduation.  Sue and her husband,
Lee, live on a  dairy farm in Hurdle
Mills, N.C.  The couple have an 18
month old daughter, Sherry Lee. Sue's
hobbies are sewing, piano and reading.
Her future plans are to enlarge her
family and eventually get into a
career field.
   Doug Richmond says, "I feel very
fortunate to have Sue as a secretary.
Her skills are topnotch.  She is an
excellent typist, well versed in
shorthand, and has good office manage-
ment capabilities.  She respects the
confidences necessary in the division
secretary position, yet will express
her mind—displaying excellent judg-
ment when her advice is sought.  She
has good initiative and willingly
tackles even the most difficult task.
On top of all this, she is a super
fine person, friendly, courteous,
                                       cerely appreciated.
                                               Karen Burnett Curtis
   Our next secretary,  Karen  Burnett
Curtis, has been married  just a
little over a month.   She and her
husband, Clifton, live in Graham,
N.C.   Karen graduated from Alamance
Central High School  and received her
B.A.  in Business Education from
Bennett College in Greensboro.  She
has 7-1/2 years experience as a
Government secretary.  Prior  to join-
ing this Agency she worked for the
U.S.  Atomic Energy Commission in
Bethesda, Md.  Her present position
is secretary to Dr.  Alfred Ellison,
Deputy Director, Environmental Scien-
ces Research Laboratory.   Karen's
hobbies include reading,  working
crossword puzzles, and playing soft-
ball.
   Dr. Ellison had this to say about
Karen, "She is an excellent secretary
and a wonderful person.  This is  a
combination that is hard to beat.
Her typing work rarely contains  an
error and all other aspects of her
assignments are performed at a cor-
respondingly high level.   Karen's
even-tempered and pleasant person-
ality are an asset to her and a  bene-
fit to  us.  All too frequently the
workload builds up and everything  has
a  short deadline.  Karen takes these
situations  in stride and before  we
                 4
             Fran Whitlow

   Our third secretary this month  is
Fran Whitlow.  Fran works  for Will
Brothers,  Director, Planning and
Management Staff,  OAQPS.   She is a
native of Hillsborough,  N.C., and
graduated from Orange High School.
Fran is married and has  a  16-month
old son, Jeffrey.   The Whitlows now
live in Bahama and are members of  Mt.
Bethel United Methodist  Church.  Fran
is on the Board of Directors of the
Bahama Volunteer Fire Department.
She is serving her third year as
Treasurer for the  Fire Department.
Her hobbies are learning to  play ten-
nis, reading, sewing, and  "watching
Jeff grow."
   When asked to comment on  Fran,
Will Brothers said, "She excels  in
everything she does and she  constant-
ly displays an exceptional ability to
handle the wide range of activities
of the P&M Staff.   She is  frequently
confronted with work situations  that
require her  immediate attention,  have
very short deadlines, and  involve
more than one division or  office—and
in pressure  situations like  this  she
(Continued on page 5)

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WHO'S UP	(Cont'd.  from  page 4)
always determines  what  is  needed,
puts things in  perspective, and then
gets the job  done  in  an  efficient,
low-key manner.  The  outstanding per-
formance demonstrated in her overall
role as secretary  and office manager
for me is vital  to the  day-to-day
operations of our  office.   She is
constantly aware of the day-to-day
happenings and always handles things
in a superior fashion.   Fran fre-
quently anticipates specific tasks
that need to be done before certain
projects or items  are given to her
and accomplishes them on her own
initiative.  She exercises mature
judgment and has the ability to ex-
amine all sides of a question and
arrive at sound, logical conclusions.
Fran's interest, cooperation, atti-
tude, initiative,  willingness, and
resourcefulness are outstanding  in
every respect and  it is really tre-
mendous having her as part of our
office."
COMBINED  FEDERAL  CAMPAIGN-A MODEL  PROGRAM
   As Federal employees, we are in-
creasingly  aware of the need to show
continuing  value and high cost effec-
tiveness  of our programs.  Now we
have an opportunity to participate
in just such a program—the Combined
Federal Campaign.  It has a proven
record of unusually high cost-effec-
tiveness  plus the element of excep-
tional need.
   Twenty years ago there were up to
twenty separate fund-raising drives
in some Federal Agencies.  Today,
however,  only one major campaign is
conducted in the Research Triangle
area which  services three United
Funds in  Durham, Raleigh, and Chapel
Hill, the International Service
Agencies, and the National Health
Agencies.  Somewhat over one hundred
separate  organizations are represent-
ed, ranging from very well known
agencies  such as the American Red
Cross, down to  local community
centers and recreation programs known
 EPA TOUCH  FOOTBALL
                        RESULTS
    The  second season of the EPA touch
 football  league opened at Erwin Field
 on  Saturday, October 2, despite the
 last minute cancellation of C. K.
 Fleaberg's Kazoo Marching Band for
 halftime  festivities.  In the opening
 contest,  Ken's Quickies overcame
 early season mistakes to edge the
 Willies 7-0 by forfeit.  The Willies'
 star, Dave Beck, was unable to play;
 thus the  Willies punted the opener.
    The  second contest had decidedly
 more action, as Dinger's Ringers
 pummelled the NERC-OFFS 40-6, with
 an  early  four touchdown blitz.  Sub-
stituting freely  in the second half,
the Ringers  experienced a defensive
lapse before posting three more
scores and having  a fourth score
discounted by officials eager to end
the debacle.   The  Ringers were led by
the Legendary Ed  Dinger with two in-
terceptions,  two  touchdowns, and one
extra point.   Former Duke track star
K. C. Hustle duplicated the Dinger's
efforts, while four other Ringers
also added points  to the board.
       League Schedule
Oct. 16   8:30 a.m. Ken's Quickies
               vs. Dinger's Ringers
         10:00 a.m. NERC-OFFs vs.
               The Willies
Oct. 30   8:30 a.m. Ken's Quickies
               vs. NERC-OFFs
         10:00 a.m.  Dinger's  vs.
               The Willies
  For further information contact:
   C. Sedman  688-8146, X-301
   K. Lloyd   688-8146, X-583
primarily  by the persons who need and
use them.
   *A11  organizations in the United
Fund are aided substantially by our
contributions, according to their
relative need.
   *A11  are organized to provide
equal  opportunity:
   1.   To  persons served,
   2.   Employment opportunities, and
   3.   Service opportunities.
   Last year collection costs local-
ly accounted for a total of 4.8%.
This exceedingly low collection rate,
combined with the excellent account-
ing and fiscal procedures required
of each participating agency, means
that your  dollar does what you in-
tended it  to do--help our less for-
tunate neighbors.
   Contribute generously—through
your payroll deduction plan.  Enjoy
the feeling of being part of that
efficient  group of Federal employees
who also care enough to help others.

NCMA TAPS MYERS
           Cecil Myers

   Cecil Myers,  CMD/OA,  recently
 received his certificate as  a Certi-
 fied Professional  Contract Manager.
 The CPCM program is sponsored by the
 National Contracts Management Associ-
 ation and is a step in recognizing
 and emphasizing professionalism re-
 quired  in the Government procurement
 field.

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CONFERENCES AND
SEMINARS
   Conference  on  Public Policy Issues
in Nuclear Waste  Management, October
27-29, Ramada/The O'Hare  Inn, Chicago
(Des Plaines), Illinois.  Sponsored
by the Energy  Research &  Development
Administration, Nuclear Regulatory
Commission, National  Science Founda-
tion, Council  on  Environmental Quali-
ty and the Environmental  Protection
Agency.

   The World Future  Society will pre-
sent "Southeast 2001—The Next 25
Years," November  12-13, at the Urban
Life Center, Georgia State Univer-
sity, Atlanta, Georgia.

   For more information on confer-
ences, contact the Public Affairs
Office, MD-31, Ext.  2951.


ANNOUNCEMENTS
   The film "AIR  POLLUTION-THE FACTS"
was shown at the  Research Center/RTP,
Wednesday, October 20 at  12:00 Noon
and again at 12:35.   It will also
be shown in the auditorium at the
Mutual Building,  Thursday, November
4, at  12:00 Noon  and 12:35.
   Anyone who did not have a chance
to see the film at the OA Open House
should take advantage of  this oppor-
tunity now.
   Twelve leading scientists, physi-
cians, and engineers, including  some
EPA'ers, share with  us  their findings
and deep concerns about  the  health
effects of air pollution—the prob-
lems and possibilities  of controlling
air pollution and the social economic
factors affecting our decisions.
(28 minutes, color)
   The Triangle Investment Club  will
meet November 9,  4:45 p.m.,  in M-303
at the Research Center/RTP.  For fur-
ther information, contact James  Kinn,
Ext. 2617.
CITIZEN  INPUT
   EPA looks  for citizen  participa-
tion on many  of its  projects, such
as 208, and many EPA'ers  have taken
that concept  and put it  to work for
themselves.  We've tracked down four
EPA'ers who are working  on two of
Raleigh's 18  Citizen's Task  Forces:
John All is and Joe All,  HERL, Malt
Stevenson, CPDD, and Ralph Larsen,
ESRL.
   John is chairman of the Northwest
Task Force and as Chairman is also a
member of the Citizen's  Advisory
Council.  Walt is a working  member of
the Task Force.  John reports that
last year their activities were di-
rected at the airport issue.  Their
Task Force put together  a 30 page re-
port in which they analyzed  the air-
port Master Plan and did an  environ-
mental impact statement  on the vari-
ous runway alternatives.   After much
study, they came to a decision to ask
the City Council of Raleigh  to with-
draw its backing of Plan B.  So far
they have not been successful  in this
particular effort, but they're in
there  talking, arguing,  and  being 1n-
volved.
   Walt commented on  some other ac-
tivities of  the  Task  Force noting
that they have been Involved in
things that  really "effect folks,"
such as the  location  of the new Rex
Hospital and other rezonlng issues.
They have worked intensively with
the Recreation Department developing
long-range plans for  the location of
new parks along  with  supporting a
tree ordinance and the development of
a greenway system connecting the city
through a series of pathways and bike-
trails.
   Joe reports that the Falls  of the
Neuse Task Force is divided into five
subcommittees dealing with community
concerns.  The parks  and recreation
committee, for example, is working
on a project to  establish a park near
a high rise which houses the elderly.
This is his  first year on the  Task
Force and he has been impressed with
the City's attitude.   "They really
seek citizen input,"  says Joe, "and
I think citizens have a better oppor-
tunity to make  themselves heard,
whether it's getting  a stop sign  in-
stalled or making changes  in the  bus
route, when we  can  speak together."
                    EPA SPEECHES AVAILABLE
Copies of recent speeches given by
EPA'ers are available from the Public
Affairs Office, ext.  2953.
Russell E. Train, Administrator:
   "Protecting the Ocean Environment:
Some Implications for Maritime Acti-
vity," delivered before the 4th
International Seapower Symposium.      i
   Remarks at two dedications:  (1)
the Maine Audubon Society Solar
Building in Falmouth, Maine; and (2)
the Muskegon County Wastewater Man-
agement System in Muskegon, Michigan.
   General remarks on regulations
given before the Governor's Commission
on the Arizona Environment at Flag-
staff, Arizona.
                  6
   "Toward a True Conservatism:
Wasting Least and Getting the Most
Out of Our Resources," before the
Portland City Club, Portland, Oregon.
   Also available, "Success Stories"
compiled by EPA's News Service Divi-
sion.  These are selected news clip-
pings from around the country de-
scribing achievements in clean air
and water.  The press office also
puts out a Weekly Briefing Book of
news clippings from around the coun-
try.  If there's an area you're par-
ticularly interested in, the Public
Affairs Office will be glad to for-
ward selected clippings to you.   All
it takes is a phone call.

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THE CORRECT TITLE IS NOW
A.M.  CAMPBELL,  Esq.
          Alfred H. Campbell

   Alfred H. Campbell  was  sworn in on
 September 17, 1976,  in Greensboro,
 to practice law before the U.S. Dis-
 trict Courts and all  State Courts in
 North Carolina.
   This is the result of four years
 of studying part-time at three dif-
 ferent law schools which included
 Duke and North Carolina Central Uni-
 versities of Durham,  the University
 of North Carolina at  Chapel  Hill, and
 a host of correspondence courses.
   In addition to his newly  acquired
 "Juris Doctor," Al Campbell  holds a
 B.S. in Biology from  AST State Uni-
 versity of Greensboro, and an M.S.
 in Biology from UNC at Chapel Hill.
   Prior to the dissolution  of the
 Air Pollution Training Institute,
 Al was Course Director for "Princi-
 pals and Practice of  Air Pollution
 Control."  This short but  comprehen-
 sive introduction to  the technology
 of air pollution control was taught
 to hundreds of individuals across the
 United States.  While with the Insti-
 tute, he also conducted a  number of
 legal courses and seminars on envi-
 ronmental legislation.
   Al is presently working in SASD/
 OAQPS.
   Congratulations Al!
PERSON-TO-PERSON
   Congratulations to Ken and  Sandy
Mull ins,  SDMO/HERL.  Sandy gave  birth
to a 7 Ib.  14 oz. boy, Michael
Douglas,  on August 30.
   Wedding  Bells will soon ring  for
Carol Daves, FMD/OA, and David Beck,
ESED/OAQPS.  They announced their
engagement  September 2 and are plan-
ning a November  20 wedding in  Durham.
We all wish Carol and Dave a long and
happy life  together.
   Vernon Daughtridge, EMB/EMSL, got
his wish.  His wife, Roxanne,  gave
birth to a  7 Ib. 15 oz. boy, Wesley
Scott, September 24.
    Congratulations  to Tom Clark, OAB/
EMSL, and  his wife  Susan on the  birth
of  a  son,  Robert Anthony Clark,  8  Ibs.
8 ozs. born September  14.
    Whit Joyner,  MDAD/OAQPS, and  his
partner Dottie DuBose of Raleigh,
won  the 1976 Tennis  Mixed Doubles
Championship.  Tournament play con-
tinued throughout  the  summer and in-
volved doubles teams  consisting  of
EPA employees and  their  partners.
    Hershell Carter,  EBD, HERL, and
his  wife Maxine, became  the proud
parents of a 6 Ib.  14 oz. baby girl
on  September 22.  Her  name  is Davita.
Oddly enough this  happened  to the
Carters on one other occasion,
September  22, 1966.   Her name is
Davila.  Coincidently,  it's a one
sign family, all are Virgos!

PERSONNEL CORNER

   The following awards were approved
during September 1976:
   QUALITY  INCREASES:
   Thompson G. Pace - OAQPS
   Dorothy  G. Rice - OAQPS
   Francis  E. King - OAQPS
   CONTINUED SUPERIOR PERFORMANCE:
   Mary E.  Whaley - OAQPS
   Edward J.  Hanks, Jr.  - OAQPS
   David  R.  Hicks - OAQPS
   Ronald J.  Drago - OAQPS
                 7
BERMAN  RECEIVES
AWARD
           Dr. Ezra Berman

   Dr. Ezra Berman, Research Veteri-
narian with HERL, received a Public
Health Service Commendation Medal
for his exceptional contribution  to
scientific knowledge on the use and
husbandry of the domestic cat in  bio-
logical research.  Dr. Berman is
nationally recognized for his work
with the domestic cat.  He has com-
piled a comprehensive bibliography of
biological information of the domes-
tic cat along with numerous other
articles. He has also been responsi-
ble for developing and carrying out
a program to determine the effects
of chronic exposure to low levels of
microwave radiation in laboratory
animals.
   Dr. Joe Held, Assistant Surgeon
General, U.S. Public Health Service,
presented the award to Berman.  In
presenting the award, Held noted  that
animal research  is the "keystone  in
our research efforts to determine
underlying causes and solutions to
the health problems as they relate
to people.  The  Public Health Service
can provide seriously needed exper-
tise to EPA," Held continued, "and
we are pleased  to have this fine
working relationship."

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REG I STRATI ON... (Con t'd. from page 3)   BRAIN  TEASER
COURTS AND LAW
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BASIC ECONOMICS
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          Annex, 128
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ENGLISH  (Grammar)
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CONSTITUTIONAL LAW
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CRIMINAL LAW
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PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT
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PHOTOGRAPHY (Darkroom Procedures)
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PLANT LIFE
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PSYCHOLOGY (General)
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                                                          - by  Frank Clay

     Sometime after midnight on the morning of July 5,  1975, Stausscheibe
Fecheimer, debonair man about town, new^ owner-opera tor  of the  fashionable
Triangle Massage Parlor, and first cousin of the late Pitot  Venturi,  was
"rubbed out," and his last earthly remains were found in  a pile  of rubble
at the bottom of a hill on the outskirts of town.   Investigators found
among the rubble, a large hypodermic needle containing  traces  of an un-
known chemical, a short length of rope, a coil spring,  and a small block
of ice.  Nearby stood what appeared to be a useless pile  of  scrap metal  to
which was fastened a ballistic trajectory impeller.
     An autopsy revealed that the victim was wearing cement  overshoes, had
been run over by a 1908 Steam Tractor just prior to being shot with a
Webly-Vickers 50.80 automatic, and his body contained enough phenoph-
thalein to kill 20 men.
     Police remained baffled until detective Hercules Poirote  of the  city
of Red Rum reconstructed the events as follows:  Stausscheibe  Fecheimer
was placed upright on a large block of ice inside  an abandoned shack, with
a rope tied around his neck.  As the ice melted, Fecheimer descended, in-
creasing the tension on the rope.  At the precise  tension, a spring-loaded
device was activated, injecting Fecheimer with the contents  of the hypo-
dermic while simultaneously releasing the wheels of the 1908 steam tractor
parked at the top of the hill.  The rotating wheels of  the tractor fired a
Webly-Vickers 50.80 automatic into the shack jusf'b'efore  the tractor
rolled through the shack, and alas, Poirote determined  that  Fecheimer had
been taken to the shack around 12:00 noon on July 4, but  came  to his
ultimate end at 4:11 A.M. July 5.  Poirote also determined that  a Webly-
Vickers 50.80 automatic was the instrument of Fecheimer's demise.
     A short time later, a gang of cut-throats and hoodlums  was  rounded  up
(except for Fossil Frank who is presently working as a  chemist in Leaven-
worth, Kansas).  Each of the suspects made four statements to  the District
Attorney, three of which were true, and one of which was  false.   The  sus-
pects were:  Mean Mary, Grimey, The Topper, Rotten Rocky, and  The Mechanic.
One of these suspects sent Stausscheibe Fecheimer to that Great  Massage
Parlor up in the sky.  Whodunnit?
The Mechanic:  I am not the killer.  I was doing some contract work in
Ann Arbor at the time.  Mean Mary is the guilty one.  I have never even
seen a Webly-Vickers 50.80.
Rotten Rocky:  I did not "rub out" Fecheimer.  The Mechanic  lied when he
said Mean Mary was the guilty one.  Grimey and I are old  pals.  Mean  Mary
owns a Webly-Vickers 50.80.
Grimey:  I did not kill Fecheimer.  Rotten Rocky has never seen  me before
in his life.  I spent the whole night of July 4-5 in a  phone booth at the
bus station trying to talk Mean Mary out of a stolen meatball  recipe.  I
never owned a 1908 Steam Tractor but I always wanted to.
Mean Mary:  I am innocent.  I was snowed in at home the night  of July 4-5.
Grimey lied about not knowing Rotten Rocky.  One of us  is guilty.
The Topper:  I am not guilty.  Although I have three Webly-Vickers auto-
matic hand guns, they are all 98.357 caliber.  I was poaching  alligators
in Florida during the night in question.  Mean Mary always lies  about the
snow.  SOLUTION ON PAGE 3
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                             TO BE ANNOUNCED LATER

                             INCOME TAX
                             INTERIOR DECORATING
                             LANDSCAPING
                             HOME REPAIR
                             SEWING-ALTERATIONS AND TAILORING
                             STATISTICS
                                       CLEMENTS (Cont'd.  from page  1)
                                       and his  Doctorate  from the University
                                       of Virginia.
                                          Dr. Clements  has  been  with EPA
                                       since 1968,  and  has  been  a major
                                       contributor  to the development  of  the
                                       Agency's quality assurance program
                                       for air  pollution  measurements.  And
                                       we at EPA would  like to add,  "Con-
                                       gratulations."

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